Today you are four years 5 months old and getting bigger every day. At least twice a week I beg you to stop growing and stay little forever, stay my little baby girl. Recently, this was your response to my plea... "Mommy I am getting bigger and bigger every day and there is nothing you can do to stop it". How true, yet it still broke my heart. Not because I really thought any different, but because at only four, you knew it as well as I. Paige, you have such a personality, much more than most children will ever have. Of course I may be a bit biased, but I really don't think so. From the time you were old enough to know how, you were keeping me on my toes. As a baby you were so, so good. You loved to cuddle and play. You did everything early, sit, stand, walk and talk. We were amazed with your ability to speak clearly, and in sentences so young. When we told you no, you listened, unlike your brother (ha!). We did everything together, there was rarely a place I did go if I couldn't take you along.
As you entered your two's, I have to admit, they weren't so terrible. I figured we were lucky and through our parenting, we were raising the perfect child. I would watch Supernanny or Nanny 911 and laugh. I always though those people were really doing something wrong, how could they let their child get to the point they were at? Well it turned out that not long after we decided to add to our family and I was pregnant with Quinn, the terrible two and a half's knocked me on my ass. Really, out cold.
I really can't pinpoint the day your everchanging personality morphed into "that child". I suppose it was around the same time you decided you wanted to be a boy. We would visit our favorite store, Target of course, and I would pray that no one should decide to talk to you...or tell you how cute you were...or look at you really. You literally would yell at these bright, shiny happy people and say, "I'M NOT PRETTY!", or "I'M NOT CUTE" or my favorite, "DON'T LOOK AT ME!!!". I was mortified! But in time, we taught you that it was okay not to like the attention but rather that get mad, it was okay to express yourself by being shy. And that really helped you understand...thankfully for all of us! It was during this time that I was told by your teacher at Aveda that every 6 months we could expect a behavior change as it took some time for your mind and what it was able to understand, to sync with what it really could comprehend. This turned out to be true, and really put things into perspective. As first time parents, we were learning right along with you!
It's wasn't 6 months later and again, we had a whole new child. From out of the cocoon emerged the sweetest, funniest and most thoughtful little girl I could ever imagine. Every day I would look at you and think, wow, 3 and a half is my FAVORITE age. Now mind you, I have said this all along, going back to me begging you not to get older, just to stay little. But the age of a preschooler, 3 to 4, is just the most fantastic age. This is when you start to become a little person no longer letting me decide who you should be because you have plenty of your own ideas. Every minute there is something new, a new question, a new game, a new understanding of something I have taken for granted. Thank you Paige for this, you help me see life through your eyes. It sounds cliche, I know, but what your world consists of is so perfectly simple, as it should be. I am honored to share it with you. I love you. Mommy
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